Alexanderplatz …. [Espionage 3] (Fiction)

Alexanderplatz Station, Berlin.

There are 12 ways to identify a suicide bomber, intoned the Israeli captain to the class. Woods recalled looking up at the dot points and the commentary that came along with them.

Point 1: If the suspect is male, check for a fresh shave.

Most of these men will be sporting a slight colour difference on their lower jaw. This is because they want to look less suspect. Keep an eye on whether the skin is lighter around the mouth and the jaw. They want to blend.

Point 2: IED-borne insurgents will be wearing suspect clothing.

Vests are awkward and so are belts. Large coats, outdoor jackets, those padded vests, all of them are suspect and are commonly employed to break up the form of the vest underneath.

Point 3: The suspect will have a robotic walk or shuffle awkwardly along.

There are 2 reasons for this. One, they are about to blow themselves up. Psyching yourself up to do something that rationally means not doing it, isn’t easy. But the real reason is because the vest is heavy. All that semtex, is fucking heavy. Not to mention all the other shit they have on there, like ball bearings, glass or even fucking cow-shit. Point is, if they’re walking slowly, or robotically, they’re loaded down and don’t want to detonate the damn thing early.

Point 4: Irritability

Point 5: Profuse sweating

Point 6: Tics

Point 7: Nervous behaviour

All of these are variations on stress. I don’t need to tell you boys about stress. You know what it does and how it affects people. But combat stress is different to suicide stress. There is a lot to suicidal stress. Most of the time, it will take a normal person lots of convincing and willpower to commit suicide. I mean, the damn act goes against human survival instinct. But in this case, it’s about making sure you don’t get detected, it’s about slipping through the security net and not being held up by some well-meaning asshole that will cause you to detonate early.

Point 8: Most suicide bombers have been reported to have irregular breathing

Beyond the obvious weight of the vest, this is also a psychological reaction to their task. Remember, everyone is new to suicide bombing. It’s their first time after all.

Point 9: Almost all suicide bombers have a blank stare before detonation

Opioids. This isn’t some 1000 yard stare because they are afraid of death. It’s the drugs in their system. We’ve only know this, because usually the head is separated from the body easily in an explosion, especially with the way how they shape the charges. After all, the head is held mostly in place by gravity and limited neck muscles. All heads discovered about 100 yards from the site of detonation usually have an opium strip in their mouths. This is to calm them down and gives them extra motivation to go through with the deed.

Point 10: Most survivors report hearing mumbled prayers from the bombers

Prayers are normal. It is normal to hear repeated surahs and phrases from the Bible or the Qu’ran before detonation. It will often be in a monotone, and serves as an enhanced psychological method to rile yourself into a religious fanaticism.

Point 11: Almost all bombers carry a large bag

Beyond the vest, there is usually a secondary amount of explosives in a bag. After all, you only get one chance of blowing yourself up. Might as well go big. You can pack a lot more in a bag, with all the extra shit they love loading in. Shrapnel kills just as much as the explosive does. If you don’t die from the explosive, then it’s the infection that gets you later.

Point 12: Their hands are almost always either in the bag or holding a switch in their pocket.

We used to be able to stop guys from blowing themselves up. Pin them in a bear hug and they can’t reach the detonator. But now they play it safe. They got it on a dead man’s switch or their hand is already ready to go without reaching for anything.

Woods remembered a student asking the Shin Bet expert on how the IDF dealt with such issues.

Easy said the Israelite with a fatalistic shrug Gun them down in the head before they blow yours off. If you don’t …. it won’t matter either way then.

Woods felt this advice keenly impressed upon his mind, as he moved through the Alexanderplatz Station, one of the busiest terminals in Berlin. Looking at his clock, he knew this was prime time.

Rush hour. 1745 HRS. A familiar time to hear IEDs (Improvised Explosive Devices) go off in Afghanistan.

Not quite so common in the heart of Europe.

The end of your shift. Everyone rushing home, eager to get some R&R, their attention on getting there, causing them to lose crucial awareness. Traffic was flowing hard and fast in both directions. People eager to make the train home and people eager to get out of the station towards home.

With 3 regional trains, 4 inner Berlin S-Bahn and 3 outer Berlin U-Bahn lines, there could be upwards of 2000 people alone in the station at any given time.

Taking out his recently acquired phone and slipping on the new glasses he had received, he activated both, going to a auspiciously named app “Handle Me!” and depressing the frame of the glasses to begin broadcasting the live tracking of the suicide bomber.

Checking that the glasses and the phone were connected, he immediately heard a slight crackle, as he placed the new headphones in one ear, the other one left alone to maintain situational clarity.

G. Woods, Whiskey Oscar Oscar Delta Sierra. Situation: Imminent ITA (International Terrorist Activity). Need TACINTEL on suspect stat. Get German BND (Bundesnachrichtendienst – Federal intelligence Service) up now.

A calm female voice immediately came through.

Wait one, Whiskey. London Station Chief coming online. Patching through your feed now.

Woods scowled to himself at the delay and mentally ran through the list in head one more time, just to be sure he wasn’t targeting a random person. The timing fit all too well but he had to be sure.

Walking past a couple who were admiring the architecture of the attractive station, he angled his head and aimed his glasses at the profile of the man, before walking quickly further up, stopping down to pretend to tie his shoe and getting a front on view of the man’s face.

Everything screamed suicide bomber. Points 1 down to 12.

Woods felt his fingers brush the Glock 19 in his waistband instinctively.

~

In London, the CIA’s CTC (Counterterrorism Centre), the Station Chief, a Machiavellian type political operator and former U.S. Army Ranger Captain, Richard Washington stared aghast at the huge Screen One that dominated the room, displaying Woods’ livestream of the events unfolding in Germany.

With over 50 people in the room, monitoring almost the entirety of Western Europe, the London CTC was home to some of the CIA’s best, brightest and ruthless intelligence analysts and hackers. More coverage, analytics and surveillance footage filtered on and off the 7 huge screens along the wall in a day, than a Wall Street firm, and Washington’s team was as adept as they came at processing raw information.

Give me CCTV’s eyes. I want to see if there are any more at Alexanderplatz. Screen Two.

Copy sir said one of the female technicians as her computer flickered through a dozen surveillance cameras.

I want a direct line to German BND stat and immediate coverage of all other major Berlin transport hubs. Screen Three. Patch BND to 2IC.

On it sir! yelled a male technician as his fingers immediately began hacking into a myriad of German transport hubs and bypassing firewalls.

Find out who that asshole Woods is following. I want everything. Name, phone, emails, give me all of it, and put it on Screen Four. Any contact he’s made in the recent weeks, anyone he’s fucking travelled with. How he got there. Give me all of it.

Washington’s aide came besides him, a fellow Ranger who had served under his command, a reliable 2IC (2nd in Command) as they came, John Watts.

Watts. I want you talking to BND. See if they got anything.

On it sir. Watts ran over to the technician who handed him a headset as he continued to ping the German intelligence service.

Give me a direct line to Woods. I want to talk to him.

~

Woods?

Sir.

I want you to be eyes on this guy, follow him. If he tries anything … take him down. We’re gathering immediate actionable intel on him now. BND will be on record in 1 mike. Do you copy?

Copy Sir. repeated Woods robotically. He was too busy navigating the crowds to say any more. His eyes were glued to the bomber.

With his freshly shaven face, the bomber looked young, in his mid-20s. He could have been considered handsome, if it weren’t for the pockmarked acne scarring across his cheeks and mouth.

His brown eyes were glazed over, his jaw heavy as he sucked on an opioid strip and tried to murmur prayers at the same time. Beads of sweat ran down from his temple and onto his collarbone and into his clothes. The jacket looked heavy, and far too warm.

The backpack arced his back slightly, causing him to stoop slightly forward to compensate for the weight. His hands was tucked deep into the pockets of his jackets and there was even a visible wire bulging through the jacket sleeves as it led up into his body.

Woods’ every instinct screamed at him to pull the trigger.

Washington’s voice came over the earpiece.

Woods, BND has confirmed that they have been tracking this terror cell for the past 2 weeks, but did not receive any actionable intel on these guys. GSG-9 and SEK are on-route now. ETA 10 mikes.

We don’t have 10 mikes to spare. Where are the station cops?

Wait one.

Woods kept the bomber on his peripheral vision as he tried in vain to look less inconspicuous. However, the bomber seemed to focus on putting one step forward to notice the CIA operative standing less than 10 metres away from.

Gun them down in the head before they blow yours off. thought Woods, recalling the Shin Bet operator’s advice.

Don’t stop at double-taps. Shoot them repeatedly in the head. Even the smallest amount of brain functioning can depress a button. The only way to stop that, is to keep shooting.

Woods? interrupted Washington in his voice. Two undercover SEK operatives are making their way to you now. They should be coming up to your position in 2 mikes. South-entrance.

Copy. Tell them to get their weapons ready. The attack is coming soon. I can feel it.

Signing off, Woods kept following the bomber as he walked up a flight of stairs to the upper level.

To his horror, as the bomber neared the centre of the station, he noted 4 more similarly dressed men start to converge into the middle.

~

Washington’s face immediately paled as he noted Woods’ livestream focus in on the 4 other terrorists.

The entire CTC room grew quiet, as they realised the magnitude of the situation. The silence was a moment of sheer dismay, shock and the dawning of failure.

Then Washington heard Woods’ voice come clear through the comms and immediately everyone sprung back into action, their hands moving in a blur across keyboards as they did whatever they could to prevent the incoming catastrophe.

I need execute authority. I can take out 4. But not the last guy. I need it now. Someone give me a sitrep on those SEK boys.

Washington paused. Every instinct screamed at him. He looked over at Screen Four and began scanning the information gathered on the first suicide bomber.

He had to be sure.

Fara Harut.

Iranian born. An orphan. Adopted early by a state sponsored religious school, suspected of strong anti-western indoctrination practices. A ready supply for terrorists cells.

Washington skipped ahead to Harut’s last recorded movements, facial recognition placing him entering Germany via Czech Republic, last seen with the 4 other men that were now converging upon each other in Alexanderplatz Station. They had split up upon crossing the border and made zero contact with one another until now.

Coincidences in the world of spies didn’t exist. Connections could always be traced back. Deja vu acts as confirmation not coincidence.

5 men, following basic operational security, to prevent detection. A busy train station at the peak of rush hour and nearly a month since the last attack. Enough to relax security services and slip past the net.

All the hallmarks of a Sphinx’s train station attack.

Washington gritted his teeth and said the fatal words.

Whiskey. You have execute authority.

~

Woods kept his eyes focused on all 5 of the suicide bombers. They were not identically dressed. But all had the 12 boxes ticked. One of them even had the decency to look nervous and afraid.

Looking behind him, Woods noted the undercover SEK policemen (German SWAT Unit) and how well armed they were with MP5 submachine guns. With their civilian clothing boosted by ballistic armour and balaclavas, they looked more paramilitary than regular armed forces, but that was the idea. The crowd parted for them like Moses in the Red Sea.

Woods moved towards them and waved them forwards. The officers, having been briefed by BND, immediately closed in behinds Woods as he pointed out the 5 men.

Both pairs of the SEK officers’ eyes widened and stiffened into shock. Both men had never dealt with suicide bombers before. One of them, the younger Officer asked Woods shakily on how to deal with such a threat.

Woods replied coldly back with an echo from his past lesson: Gun them down in the head before they blow yours off.

Motioning that one of the officers had to stay back and warn civilians away, Woods took the other officer and told him to stay at the right flank, whilst he moved left of the group of 5 men. He also stole an extra magazine for his Glock as he moved past the crouching officer.

Anyone I miss … you kill. said Woods firmly to the SEK Officer who nodded firmly and tried to hide his shaking hands.

To his relief, Woods noted that the 5 men were still standing near each other, their chanting and prayers beginning to pick up in volume slightly.

People were beginning to catch on and whilst panic had not quite set in yet, it was a hair-trigger away from full blown pandemonium.

Woods knew this was his only chance.

In his appendix holster, he had 1 spare magazine. 17 rounds + 15+1 in his actual Glock 19.

Another 15 rounds in his back pocket, from the SEK Officer who didn’t realise he was missing a magazine.

47 bullets.

This was going to be close.

Woods moved directly towards them, as they began to split up. There was no point in detonating all at once. You didn’t kill as many people if you all went up together. Structural damage and psychological terror could only be achieved through multiple blasts that threw people in every single direction.

This would buy Woods time.

Precious seconds.

The closest terrorist began moving closer to Woods, his eyes focused on the floor, his hands coming out of his pocket, as the station’s clock began the final countdown to 6pm exactly. A mental countdown started in Wood’s mind. He had a total of 10 seconds.

Woods felt his Prince persona shine through and without hesitation, he lifted up his henley shirt with his left hand, and gripped the Glock 19 with his right.

The palm of his hand smacked into the butt of the dark pistol, and his fingers curled around and snatched the weapon up and outwards, his left hand meeting both the pistol and right hand halfway through, before they continued in unison into a firing position, elbows slightly crooked, the back sight and front sight lining up level to his green eyes.

4 sharp cracks in rapid succession, resounded resolutely and the atmosphere of the entire station changed.

The muted pop music that once dominated the station’s rhythm, aiding in people getting home in a hurry and to believe that they were safe, was suddenly drowned out by screams, mass hysteria and the sounds of thousands of feet moving in unison.

The sounds of thousands of people running in every direction, activated in everyone a primal urge to flee. It didn’t matter what the threat was, the average brain was locked in a rictus of fear and panic, and that was all Washington could see on the screen, as what was once orderly was now chaotic.

Hundreds of people were screaming, running, jogging, sprinting and many more were standing equally still, frozen before the mass of movement, unable to comprehend the situation before them.

Confusion reigned supreme, as the CTC staff looked on in horror. Then one of the technicians noted Woods advancing through the crowd, the lone SEK officer doing his best to follow with his clunkier MP5 submachine gun and placed the CCTV grainy footage on Screen 1.

Washington noted the bleeding corpse that the Prince casually stepped over, as he moved through the crowd with ease, the blood rapidly spooling out from the four headshots that the Prince had inflicted within a blink of an eye.

Squinting hard, Washington watched with concentrated horror and encouragement as the Prince moved to within 5 metres of the next terrorist and Washington watched as another 5 rounds expelled from the Glock 19 in the Prince’s hands and somehow magically miss everyone that ran in between and beyond, and slam directly into the target’s head.

The rounds, snapped the terrorists head to the side, flinging him down to the floor, his finger unable to depress the button that would activate the detonator.

By now, the crowd was slowly beginning to thin out, people aware that the action was all occurring in the middle of the station and learning to avoid it.

The SEK officer was still desperate to try and aim at the target Woods had told him to, but his fear of hitting a civilian was too great and he couldn’t press the trigger. He froze, his finger desperate to press inwards, but his mind unable to commit to such a dangerous action. None of his training had prepared him for this moment.

But he kept moving closer towards the threat. His duty overrode his fear.

He looked across at the Prince, as he ruthlessly tripped a sprinting woman to the ground, causing her to fall heavily, but open his line of sight to the third terrorist who was slowly catching on to what was happening and beginning to turn around to face the Prince.

The Prince’s seven rounds crossed the 10 metres and impacted heavily across the man’s face, ripping through eyes, brain, jaw and cheek, the final round neatly severing the medulla oblongata, causing the terrorist’s outstretched hand to never function.

With his immediate twelve, two and eleven o’clock target dealt with, there were now only two terrorists left, his original suspect, Fara Harut and the final bomber behind him.

The execution of the three men had elapsed the Prince’s precious inner timer down to 4 seconds remaining.

An example had to be made. The Prince’s right thumb depressed the magazine catch, as his left hand swept down, and took out the spare magazine in a smooth and robotic motion, a rehearsed manoeuvre that took only a precious second, as the hand swept upwards and into the base of the pistol, before wrapping around the right hand again. His right thumb released the slide catch, and the Glock’s slide slammed forward, chambering the first round.

The green eyes never wavered behind the sight and the Prince kept moving forwards, his right index finger a blur, as Fara Harut, in a sacrificial gesture, stepped between the Prince’s Glock and his fellow terrorist behind him.

The entirety of all 17 rounds of the Prince’s Glock slammed into Harut’s head, somehow the terrorist’s body staying upright under the onslaught of 9mm rounds. His face completely disappeared under the weight of the fire, chunks of flesh, brain, blood and bone spraying outwards as round after round slammed in a move so fast, that it actually stunned the final terrorist, whose fear was now palatable as he beheld the Prince.

However the Prince’s final reload would take too long. He had reach into his back pocket for the final 15 round magazine he had taken from the SEK Officer.

The SEK Officer in question, who had only just received an emergency call from BND and was looking forwards to a hot dessert after his shift. A man who told his younger partner to take the safer job of warning away civilians.

It was he who noted that it was now too late for the Prince to do anything about the final bomber and was himself only a mere 3 metres away from the vest, having fought his way through the crowd to get a shot in with his MP5.

He knew the Prince’s plan, prayed that it was going to work, but could see it would fail and was resigned for this very eventuality.

With a final look at the Prince, whose hands were blurred in a reload, the SEK Officer gritted his teeth, sprinted forward and tackled the bomber. The momentum slid them towards a support pole, that would take most of the blast.

He closed his eyes, as the terrorist did the same.

The finger pressed the button.

The Prince’s persona left Woods as his survival instinct took over the moment he saw the SEK Officer make his move.

Dropping his pistol, he spun on his heels, and dove for the floor, and rolled behind a sturdy food stall selling snacks and drinks.

Clamping his hands over his ears and burying his head as low as it could get into his knees, Woods shut his eyes.

He felt it first in his chest, then he heard a cavernous roar and then nothing.

The Prince sunk into an eternal darkness where nothing could hurt him again nor would anything comfort him for an eternity.

Author’s Note

Those who are fans of Paul Greengrass’ adaptation of book to film, Bourne’s Ultimatum (2007) will no doubt notice the similarities I’ve adopted for the Alexanderplatz Station with the famous and tense Waterloo sequence in that film.

Alexanderplatz is also a rather obvious reference to the previous entry in that series, Bourne Supremacy (2004) where the temporary abduction of one Nicky Parsons by Bourne also took place.

I wanted to capture the urgency, tension and paranoia of that scene and am grateful for John Powell’s incredible score to help me tap into that.

I also based the final sequence where Woods kills the terrorist on my favourite espionage series’ Gabriel Allon in Prince of Fire where he is faced with a similar scenario and is forced to take similar drastic actions to stop a series of terrorist bombings from going off in Paris’ Gare de Lyon station.

For fans of Jack Reacher, the 12 ways to ID a suicide bomber are stolen directly from Lee Child’s Gone Tomorrow for which I gratefully pay props to. I have no idea if it is accurate, and based on truth, but his writing always had an air of believability about it, so I thought it would be fun to incorporate into this story.

I originally planned this to be a quick stop and make Woods go straight to London, but chose to make this extended action sequence for further motivation and establish the threat of the Sphinx.

Until the next one!

~ Damocles.

The Prince …. [Espionage 2] (Fiction)

Alexanderplatz, Berlin.

An anonymous man in a suitably non descript black suit walked towards Woods, his hand gripping a briefcase.

Gabriel Woods watched from the corner of his eye, as the man stopped nearby and turned to examine the famous tourist square. The movement allowed Woods to see the the man’s hand on the briefcase, in which he was gripping it with just his index, and thumb. The other three fingers were splayed out.

Three is good, two is bad recalled Woods.

Miming his surprise at seeing an old friend, Woods walked over to the man with a smile and an arm outstretched. The man responded similarly and they mimicked a conversation, whilst the man handed the briefcase in an effusive gesture. Woods smiled and walked away, the grin wiped away the moment the charade was over.

Walking towards the Berlin Alexanderplatz Station, and past the famous Weltzeituhr (World Clock), displaying the current time in 148 major cities around the world, Woods rested the briefcase in one hand and popped the clasps with the other.

Taking out a small key, he walked over to the train lockers that lined the exterior of the station and searched for the number on the key.

Opening the locker, he placed the briefcase inside and looked at the contents proper.

Inside, Woods noted the new passport that had been issued to him, proclaiming his name to be Christian Taylor, a UK resident from Cornwall. Noting that the photo featured rather thick framed glasses, Woods looked inside for the pair of spectacles that would accompany him as a disguise. Opening the simple black case, Woods tried the glasses on, and was pleased with the fit.

Tapping the side of the glasses, he noted the thickness of the frame, a feature that allowed tiny pin-sized cameras to be installed on both sides of the spectacles. A simple unidirectional microphone also allowed remote recording of conversations up to 20 metres away, and with its’ wireless capability, it could transmit intel to his phone that would send the audio-visual footage to a CIA station nearby.

Woods also noted the new phone that would replace most of the capabilities of the military laptop he was used to. A nondescript Android design, the phone hid its true potential behind false apps, that Woods would have to explore, to unlock what each function would do.

The final spy-craft item in the briefcase was a pair of headphones, that disguised recording and transmitting abilities allowing him to talk and report back, or listen in on conversations heard through his glasses. Shaped like any wireless headphones, they were a functional black colour, and fit in his ears snugly.

In addition to the gadgets, Woods found a wallet with 1000 English pound and 1000 Euros, with plenty of different denominations, a car key that also featured another key to the safe-house and to his surprise, a spare pair of smokey lens for his glasses that would double as sunglasses.

Placing all these items into various pockets on his person, Woods left the briefcase in the locker and took out the key. He would head over to the Tiergarten, a huge national park that was near the US Embassy and deposit the locker key in an agreed spot for collection.

As he hopped aboard a yellow-white Strabenbahn tram to the park, Woods recalled the brief he had read onboard the C-17 from Afghanistan, about the target he was meant to observe and eventually stop.

Blessed with a photographic memory and near perfect recall, Woods replayed in his mind the personal call from the Station Chief in the CIA London’s operating centre, as the C-17 flew through the night sky, his hands gripping a headset that the loadmaster had given him.

Woods,

You’re probably wondering why we took you out of Afghanistan and transferred you to Europe. Well, we’re aware of your history there and this is priority one. Our Foreign Security Assessment (FSA) indicates that there is going to be a global terrorist attack happening on UK soil in a week from now.

Intelligence suggests that it will be occurring on the Valentine’s weekend where traffic is expected to be at an all time high. We’re putting every major asset in Europe on standby and we’ll be cooperating with your old crew, UKSF and SIS on this.

The truth is, you were asked to come, because the UK PM specifically asked for your services. We know that you are on loan for us from the Brits, so we couldn’t refuse when they asked for you to come back.

Anyway, the bad news is that we don’t know the exact time of the attack. We suspect it is going to be in the evening because that is where traffic will be high. However, because Valentine Day’s falls on a Friday, we are not exactly sure whether they’ll be hitting Friday, Saturday or Sunday or worse case …. all three fucking days.

In any case, it is imperative that you make contact with your SIS contact and start covert surveillance on Sofia, a courier for Hassan Malik, an operative we’ve nicknamed the Sphinx, due to how well he seems to hide his tracks. We’ve been after this guy for nearly 2 years and have still been unable to properly track his whereabouts and movements.

We know he is Europe based, because we’ve managed to extract intel from detainees and low-level HVTs in Iraq, Afghanistan and Pakistan. He’s been responsible for the recent train bombings in Paris, Madrid and Athens and we think its only a matter of time before he strikes in England.

As you can already see in the brief, actual photographs and intel on Malik is scarce. The only photo we have is approximately 5 years old, way back when he was in AQ training camps in Iran. At the moment, he’s considered a rogue terrorist for hire, a highly dangerous operative who offers his services to any groups linked to anti-Western agencies and government.

We don’t know who is backing him, as it could be any source ranging from Hezbollah, the Ayatollah or even Saudi backers. All we know is, he’s got a domestic network in Europe, and the logistics and capabilities to strike almost anywhere on the Continent.

Thus the key for you, is to find Sofia. Detainee reporting states that she is one of Malik’s most trusted couriers and sources.

Find Sofia, track her, and then eliminate Malik.

Currently, Sofia is under heavy surveillance. A team from 14th Det is tracking her 24/7. She has not made any suspect moves, but we’ve done the usual bugging and tracking on her phone, apartment and email.

I’m not gonna sugar-coat it Woods, the reason why you were chosen, is because we still think you’re the scalpel, you were in the past.

Europe could use help from a graduate from the Counter-Revolutionary Warfare. The guy known as the Prince only 6 years ago.

Show the Sphinx, why Europe is really the Prince’s domain, not his.

Good luck Woods.

Woods snapped out his reverie when he heard the tram driver announce the stop for Tiergarten. The change from the mountains of Afghanistan to the well-oiled streets of Germany still played with Woods’ mind. He found himself unused to the sensation of comfortable footwear that didn’t drag in the snow and mud. The sharper, cleaner air that didn’t have the faint scent of petrol, oil and spice.

Even the atmosphere was different, the sounds of people chatting softly in German, slower and more measured, relaxed and safe, a far cry from the rapid-fire Dari and Pashto in Kabul, the type of conversation you knew you had to hurry, because you didn’t know when something would end it terminally.

Even the idea of being onboard a functioning tram was alien to Woods, who had spend so many months simply walking everywhere in Kabul.

Acclimatise quickly and blend in even quicker recalled a mantra taught to him long ago.

Hopping off, Woods walked towards the park and began to count down the trees, before hiding the key to the train locker underneath an auspiciously placed rock at the base of the 7th tree.

Walking away and taking the return tram back towards Alexanderplatz, Woods tried to relax slightly, but his mind was occupied on the Sphinx. As Woods got off the tram at the Alexanderplatz station and began his walk to long-term carpark for his car, it was then he noted the odd shuffle of a man wearing a backpack nearby. He was making his way into the main entrance of the train station, pale and murmuring under his breath.

At first, Woods decided that it was just a homeless guy moving around the city. Berlin, whilst prosperous, still had its’ fair share of homeless people.

But usually due to malnutrition and poor mental health, they would pick a spot and rarely move. They would beg along a popular street, they wouldn’t be out and about if they didn’t have to.

Besides this man didn’t have the usual ragged clothing of a homeless person. He was dressed like an out-of-towner. A man who didn’t belong. A tourist. An outsider.

Woods frowned as he noted people seemed to subconsciously give this man a wide berth. Women would give double-takes, their eyes coming up from their phones more than once, unsure about why the man had his head down and was shuffling his feet so much.

Men would take an extra step to the right or left, unwilling to brush past closely, as if he smelled bad. They made the extra effort to sidestep him.

An alarm bell began to signal in Woods head. The fresh scars from Afghanistan were still bleeding into his mind. He recalled his training, the impressions he had received on his very first tour of Afghanistan, embedded in him by a Israeli IDF Shin Bet operative.

The 12 ways to identify a suicide bomber. They all gave the same clues. They were all unprofessional at it. After all, they’re amateurs at blowing themselves up. This is their first time doing it.

No one gets another chance at doing it.

Nor does anyone get another chance at stopping it.

Woods dropped his carry bag, lifted his shirt to check the Glock 19 in his waistband and immediately starting running.

Woods …. [Espionage 1] (Fiction)

ISAF (International Security Assistance Force) personnel on patrol, around Kabul at night in 2008.

The scent of petrichor slowly permeated the air, until it was all CIA Special Operations Group (SOG) Paramilitary Operations Officer Woods could smell.

The spice that usually perfumed the Afghan marketplaces in Kabul slowly receded as rain began to hammer the streets, turning the ground into dark, muddy slush that stuck to boots and the hems of coarse hessian trousers.

Woods aimed his gaze upwards, staring up the street, that stretched towards the Hindu Kush mountains that dominated the landscape of the capital city.

In the distance, tiny dots littered the sky, kites being flown by children, as they weaved their creations in deadly dances, mock combat being practised by skilled hands.

Woods watched as a scarlet kite smashed into a green one, crumpling the frame, noting the strong gust of wind that discarded the corpse of the green kite further away than the children expected.

Looking down at the weathered crimson carpet, he picked up the small tea cup and tossed back the amber tea, savouring the slightly spicy, sweet taste of Afghan chai, before standing up and adjusting his colourful kufi cap.

Brushing down his Perahan tunban tunic, and buttoning up his sleeveless vest, Woods ambled slowly over to the reception desk and handed over a few afghani into the tin bowl.

The elderly shopkeeper smiled and nodded his head in thanks at Woods, who nodded back and wandered back onto the streets of Kabul, to resume his search for the missing hostage.

Making his way through the people of Kabul, Woods ducked and weaved past hundreds of small minivans and bicycles, the endless cacophony of traffic adding to the chaos of colours, smells and wares on display. The Market Sediq Omar was always busy, with hundreds of goods on display, piled together unceremoniously and without any true reason or logic behind them.

It was atypical of bazaar experiences, claustrophobic, dense, overwhelming and fun. Merchants would rapid-fire Pashto at anyone who would walk by, with a particularly bothersome salesman insisting that Woods examine his electronics.

Woods, politely extricating himself with a firm grasp on the hand that rested on his shoulder, demurred politely in quiet Pashto, before silently disappearing into the crowd.

Within the tall structure that housed multiple levels of residents, the marketplace itself dominated the courtyard of the apartment complex, a hotbed of activity, both illicit and legal.

Woods had been frequenting this market for the past month, his Taliban source, a certain “spice” merchant whose product had more white than any other colour, a regular at this bazaar. This was the cost of war, turning an blind eye to certain dealings on the streets to fight more effectively in the mountains.

However, today there were going to be no such appearance. The weather was only going to worsen, as the rain would intensify and turn to snow soon.

Gently pushing a tall man out of the way, Woods made his way into the only functioning lift and pressed a button to reach the 4th floor. Silence filled the empty chamber as the doors creaked shut, unconvincingly.

As the elevator groaned slowly upwards, Woods lifted up his vest and checked through a a slit in his tunban tunic, that he could still access his trusty Glock 19 in its appendix carry holster. Reassured by the weight of the cold steel, he counted down the seconds until the elevator would reach the 4th floor, the average time being around 40 seconds.

At 38 seconds, the doors rasped open, and Woods sidled out, and made his way around to room 417, looking down and admiring the view of the marketplace below, as noise and the smell of spice and nuts wafted upwards to the sky.

Taking out a cheap key, he slid it into the wooden door, and carefully scanned the spartan apartment, before locking the door behind him.

It was a bold decision to have a hideout, right atop the market where all sorts did business, but the risk had paid off for the past couple of months.

Actionable intel was genuinely rare to receive, and Woods had managed to score 3 crucial pieces of intel that led to boots on the grounds and bodies underneath the snow. 3 vital pieces of the puzzle in less than 6 months.

A high risk, high reward play. So, in spite of the danger, Woods chose to stay and maintain this hideout.

Looking up at the door, he slid a deadbolt into place and undid the hooks on his appendix holster and placed it on a table, where a dirty rag that smelled of oil and grease reminded him of his duties.

Walking over to his bed, he reached underneath and pulled out a military laptop, encased in ballistic padding and with a small secure aerial that allowed encrypted access to the internet.

Typing in a standard report, effectively stating that he saw nothing of note today, Woods spent a moment browsing area reports, and noted that this week was slow and quiet. Winter was like that.

Sighing quietly, he closed the laptop shut and placed it underneath his bed, before reaching into a large duffel bag and extracting his pistol calibre carbine (PCC), a venerable MP5A5 with a sling, a torch and Aimpoint Micro T-2 optic.

Despite its Cold War status and age in comparison to better and more advanced weaponry, Woods still enjoyed using the MP5. Its’ legendary status, sealed with his original unit, the 22nd SAS, had been proven time and time again, with its remarkable reliability, accuracy and recoil impulse.

It also helped that the ammunition that serviced the weapon was the same for his Glock 19, thus ensuring lower cost and more ammunition carried if there was ever a firefight.

Picking up the dirty rag, Woods stripped the MP5, carefully putting aside the T-2 optic, the Surefire torch and the sling in neat corners, before taking a screw driver and undoing the weapon. With a tiny plastic bottle of oil, he cleaned the weapon methodically, and caressed each part with care.

Once every part was well greased, he swiftly reassembled the weapon and leaving the magazine out, flicked the ambidextrous safety to semi and aimed the tiny red dot at a circle on the wall.

Hearing the satisfying click, he flicked down the safety, pulled back the charging handle and inserted a skinny magazine, before slapping the handle forward, allowing it to chamber a round.

Putting the MP5 aside, Woods examined his Glock 19 and had just tucked his weapons away, when he heard a knock on the door and his mobile phone buzz.

Staring at the screen, he frowned and moved to the door, where he saw a man dressed similarly to him, nervously scanning the area, his hands falling back his side, as he finished knocking.

Woods opened the door, his right hand concealing the Glock behind his leg and felt his eyes widen in surprise.

Samir?

Khalid. This is urgent. You’ve been reassigned. We need to go now.

Samir, Wood’s local runner in Afghanistan stepped inside the room and handed him a burner phone. A heavyset man, with an impressive beard and dark enigmatic eyes, Samir was one of the many locals that helped Officers like Woods gather extra intelligence, in exchange for money or extradition to the States.

Samir, was one of the very first that had signed up to the CIA program, and was extraordinarily good at his job, despite the dangers and lack of training. For him to break cover and contact Woods in this manner, meant that this was serious.

Woods flipped the phone case open and keyed in the number his handler had reserved for emergencies. After a brief pause, a female voice came over the teeny speaker.

Woods. This is full priority situation. We’re pulling you out and reassigning you to Europe. More details to follow. Samir will organise extract and sanitation. This is a FSA (Foreign Security Assessment) priority level 5.

Understood. said Woods as he heard the phone click and watched as the screen self-destructed into darkness.

Give me five Samir.

Samir nodded and waited by the door, nervous. He looked out the tiny keyhole and noted that the weather had begun to worsen. Snow was now drifting lazily across the sky and the temperature was dropping further and further. Samir shivered involuntarily.

Taking out a large carry bag, Woods efficiently shoved the laptop, his MP5, and spare surveillance equipment in, before zipping it tight. A well-rehearsed move, all traces of espionage equipment was gone in 2 minutes. Woods spent the last 3 minutes checking over his bed, desk for anything he might have dropped or any incriminating evidence.

Pleased, he shouldered the heavy bag and walked over to Samir. The two left in silence, threading their way through the market that was closing up, before hopping into a decrepit white Toyota Corolla. As Samir pulled away into the traffic, Woods took a look back at the place that had served as home for a while.

As he did so, he noted a large Toyota HiLux Ute also start up and begin to follow in the direction they were headed.

Scowling, Woods said quietly. We got company.

Samir looked in the mirror and felt the blood drain from his face.

I’m sorry Khalid. They must have followed me.

It’s alright Samir. Punch it. We can make it to airport. Go, go.

Samir nodded grimly and put his foot down, the Corolla jerking forward instantly and nearly hitting a donkey as it barrelled down the tight roads of Kabul. Despite its’ appearance, the car was actually well-maintained and had significant upgrades for emergencies such as the one Woods and Samir found themselves in.

Snow continued to pound the windshield. Their breathing fogged the glass and Woods began a breathing exercise, designed to expel stress.

With a mixture of tight winding roads and super-highways, Kabul’s landscape was surprisingly modern, with many colourful buildings that were undergoing restoration and dozens upon dozens of stalls and vendors lining the streets, beside colourful flags and umbrellas.

To get to safety, Samir merely had to reach a super-highway and begin high-tailing down the long stretch of road for 5 kilometres, before they could be in the safe haven of the Hamid Karzai International Airport.

A simple task, but then the devil was in the details regarding execution.

Samir yanked on the handbrake, as he drifted the small car around a corner, nearly clipping an old woman, who ignored the reckless driving and continued her way down the alleyway. Even when the HiLux’s side mirror nearly hit her arm as it blasted after the Corolla, the Afghan native merely gave a fatalistic shrug and adjusted the basket of laundry she carried on her hip.

Woods kept his right arm outstretched on the dashboard, securing himself as the Corolla harshly jumped a small hump, and kept an eye on the Ute, who he now noted had 2 individuals inside, with one man gripping an Uzi submachine gun and the other manically concentrating on the chase.

Hold on Khalid! yelled Samir, as he ignored the stop sign at the exit of the road and cut in front of a truck, whose horn blasted angrily.

The Corolla skidded across the highway, smoke shooting from the tyres and brakes squealing in a high pitched whine.

Woods and Samir yelled in unison, as the car came sliding towards a minivan, and they collided with a sickening crunch. Both cars reeled in the impact, shattering the window and causing Samir’s head to lurch into the side of the minivan, effectively knocking him out.

Woods, groaned and looked out his window and saw the HiLux coming out of the alleyway. His eyes narrowing in clinical concentration, Woods felt his hands yank out the Glock 19 and he aimed the pistol at the large front right tyre and pulled the trigger rapidly.

The gunfire immediately sent the experienced people of Afghanistan scrambling for cover, those who had gotten out of their cars to help, running back and taking cover immediately, their hands over their heads.

The HiLux drove on, intent on ramming the Corolla. However the driver felt pressure immediately slacken on his front tyre and to his shock, the car lurched to the right and narrowly missed the stricken Corollla. Realising his mistake, the driver tried to brake, but the concrete barrier that separated the two sides of the highway was now too close.

The HiLux smashed into the barrier and both men felt their bodies lurch forward and brought to an immediate stop, the pressure of their seat-belts smashing into their chest, and their heads experiencing extreme whiplash.

Both men vainly attempted to get out, but couldn’t, their hands unable to depress the button for the seatbelt. The driver opened his eyes blearily, and saw the damaged Corolla drive away, before blacking out.

Woods kept his foot down, the Corolla’s engine ticking over angrily, as he sped down the highway and towards the airport. He looked at Samir, whose head had ceased bleeding, after Woods had dug out his first aid kit and applied battlefield superglue to the gash on his head. It had taken him considerable strength to move Samir from the driver seat and to the back, his eyes wandering over the HiLux constantly but manage it he did.

Minutes later, Woods pulled up to the NATO RSM (Resolute Support Mission, the successor the ISAF in Afghanistan) Base at the Hamid Karzai International Airport, digging out his ID card and allowing the U.S. Marine on guard to call for a medic for Samir.

Squeezing Samir’s shoulder, he allowed the paramedics take him away. As they wheeled Samir away on a gurney, a young Lieutenant came running up to him, and saluted, her hot breath misting the cold air.

Sir! If you would follow me to the command hub.

Woods nodded and shouldered his bag, following the Lieutenant through the maze of temporary buildings and barracks, refamiliarising himself with the layout of the base. It had been over 4 months since he had last set foot here, his usual stop being Bagram Airfield.

Walking past the mess hall and a platoon of Marines going about their daily exercises, Woods could hear snippets of German, Italian and English accents mesh together, through the door, as men and women filed in and out of the hall. There was even a small hint of Australian, his native tongue, rising above the usual chatter.

The Lieutenant knocked on the door of the command hub and in entered Woods, placing his large duffel bag near the entrance of the door. As his eyes adjusted to the perpetual darkness of the room, Woods noted the 3 men in uniform and a singular woman in civilian garb standing around, talking to each other animatedly.

His CIA handler, an attractive redhead by the name of Jessica, stared at him, initially unsure who the bearded, rough looking Afghan man standing before her was, before walking over and giving him a friendly hug.

Gabriel. I didn’t recognise you for a second there.

Woods gave an ironic smile.

Means the Khalid disguise worked. Good to see you too Jess. Why was my extraction hot?

It wasn’t meant to be that way. But somehow Samir was compromised. I’m not sure how. We’re looking into it though. They were following him, and it was poor timing that we asked him to get you out as well.

Who is ‘they’?

Our old friends. The Haqqani.

Woods grimaced.

Jess noted his gesture and tried to reassure him. Samir will be on the first flight State-side. We own him that much. Anyway, I got to talk to your about your reassignment. Don’t worry about those boys over there.

Jess gestured to the 3 men in uniform who were looking over at them, talking quietly to each other. I’ll handle the Colonel. He’s just upset about losing you, due to the quality of intel you’ve provided for RSM this rotation. However, I’ve already stressed to him about the FSA.

Jess walked over to her station, and bought up a PDF file.

I’ll be uploading this onto a tablet soon. It’ll explain why you’re being reassigned. A C-17 Globemaster is about to finish loading up its supply run. That’s your flight out of this shithole.

You’ll be flying to Germany, where you’ll be provided gear and coordinates for a safehouse in London. We want you in as deep cover, thus no direct flight to London, I’m afraid. It’ll be a road-trip for you.

From there, you’ll have to do some detective work straight away to find Hassan Malik, code-named SPHINX. A local contact from SIS will link up and you’ll get more info then.

You can read more about Sphinx in the brief. For now, Langley just want close surveillance. Good luck Gabriel. I’m staying here to monitor more movement, so I won’t be joining you.

Woods nodded and took the military tablet from her station before shaking her hand warmly. Jess hugged him in return and whispered “Good luck.” Ignoring the military men in uniform, Gabriel grabbed his bag and went in search of the nearest bathroom and a razor. It was time to remove the beard, and look human again.

10 minutes later, Woods stared at his reflection in the mirror.

At a rugged 31 years of age, Woods’ face was unconventionally attractive, with piercing green eyes and dark hair. His skin was well-tanned, and creased, an unfortunate side effect of his job, a feature that would make him stand out in a much paler Europe. His facial hair was shadowy, despite his best efforts with a razor to grant him a clean-shaven look. He had even given himself a rudimentary haircut, lopping long locks of his obsidian black hair off, to resemble that of a crew cut.

His flawless ability to navigate the many dialects of Afghanistan had made him a natural choice for the region, his features almost indistinguishable from a local, once a thick beard was developed. To pull him out, and compromise his cover, meant that this wasn’t an ordinary operation.

Shrugging to himself, he slipped into clean civilian clothes that Jess had provided him; a white henley shirt, a thick navy woollen jumper, a grey waterproof jacket and black sturdy jeans to match the combat boots. Shouldering his bag again, Woods looked at the giant hulking military plane that was to take him to Germany.

At a monstrous 53 metres in length, with a wingspan of 51 metres, the dark matte grey plane was as long as it was wide, capable of accommodating a 69 ton M1 Abrams tank, and nearly 85 tons of weight. A true behemoth of the sky, the C-17 Globemaster earned every inch of its name.

This particular airplane housed a pair of Bradley Fighting Vehicles, IED damage evident on their exterior, no doubt being shipped back State-side for extensive repairs. Dozens upon dozens of palleted cargo covered in camouflage netting lined the hull of the Globemaster and an U.S. Air Force loadmaster waved him onboard, handing him a pair of headphones.

Nodding gratefully, Woods made a motion about eating and the loadmaster nodded and shouted:

Over there! Grab yourself some MREs! I’ve already placed a hammock for ya by the mess!

Giving him the thumbs up, Woods secured his bag in the webbing of the plane’s wall and walked over to the mess, ripping open an MRE (Meal Ready to Eat) bag. He microwaved the contents, before tucking in to a hot meal of Sausage Peppers and Onions, chasing the main course with a trail mix recovery pack.

Looking over at the mess table, Woods felt the plane begin to move and threw away the packing of the MRE into a nearby bin, before keeping the unopened food nearby. Strapping himself in the hammock, he closed his eyes and waited for the ride to end.

Author’s Note

I know, I am taking a break from my Sci-Fi Sol series, but I was clamouring to write something in this current reality and universe.

This will hopefully be a series I’ll smash through quickly before picking up where I left Raikkonen and Kournikova in Sol.

I have a much better feeling and sense of the ending for this story, than I did for Sol so I am hopeful it’ll be a nice quick story I can polish off.

I am attempting to be a bit more descriptive about my world building, akin to Ian Fleming‘s style, but it is taking a bit more work than I anticipated!

Until the next one!

~ Damocles.

What If? Damocles was Attractive.

Tom Hardy. My kind of man.

I’ve never really considered myself attractive. Charismatic perhaps, but not handsome.

Arguably, according to anecdotal evidence, my most attractive physical feature are my hands. They are slender, with attractive nails and have the stereotypical look that reflect that of an pianist (which I used to be one) or an artist.

I can’t really display my hands though, as a means to attract women. Doing jazz hands everywhere seem …. bizarre to say the least and crazed to exaggerate.

There are small things I can do, to improve myself naturally.

Sleep earlier to remove my now iconic eye bags, exercise more to accentuate my jawline and cheekbones. Get a tattoo across my upper arm, gain a scar across my cheek.

I could actually style my hair, which I genuinely consider is a deal-breaker.

Having a bad hair day, creates a very average looking Damocles, verging on unattractive.

A proper haircut, combined with a bunch of other factors like where the sun is, the angle of the photo taken, how far you are relative to the Moon and a worthy sacrifice to Venus herself, could transform Damocles from a middling generically Asian individual, into a slightly attractive one.

I would have to say, I rely mostly on humour, charisma and confidence to attract women.

I think I am reasonably amusing, as I seem to elicit a fair amount of smiles with my constant wisecracks. If I had to describe my humour, it’s something similar to classic Spider-Man comics, slightly corny, slightly lame and delivered with aplomb.

Throw in non-PC topics, a flirtatious air, overtly sexual references, and a goodly dose of stiff British sarcasm and that’s my humour.

My confidence borders and often crosses in arrogance. There is a devil-may-cry attitude to my personality, that I think attracts women. I’m always chasing thrills, attempting to become more of a man, and I think that type of masculinity is inherently interesting.

I am more gentle, calm and respectful around women, but I don’t let it overpower my inherent brashness. It’s natural for me to behave that way, without compromising my identity and I think that is attractive as well. Too many men are as equally fake and disingenuous about their actions and behaviour around women and people can sense that.

I’m a flexible person, emotionally speaking. Whether you’re aloof or clingy, I can support both with relative ease.

So, if I consider myself such a Don Juan, what is the purpose of this What If?

Well, you can always be more handsome can’t you? When I look at the current crop of British actors dominating Hollywood, I can’t help but be envious.

Henry Cavill, looks like he was carved out of marble, with his Greco-Roman style and extremely masculine features and body. Even his hair curls like Michelangelo’s David. The fact that he is a sweaty, greasy gamer, doesn’t even remotely detract from his attractiveness which is a call-back to antiquity.

Cillian Murphy looks like the most enigmatic individual. His eyes could stop an arrow in mid-flight, so piercing they are. He’s the pretty boy, the angelic man who could charm you with his soft Irish accent and thoughtful mannerisms. There is a great deal of intelligence behind his eyes and demeanour. A introspective individual whose self-awareness and looks attract a lot of people.

Tom Hardy is my male crush though. He has that ruggedness that I have always longed to possess. His jawline and lips are his most standout feature, and there is a strange sense of tragedy behind his eyes. He is seemingly dangerous, sexy, thoughtful and calculating all at once. He has the look of a man who has been and seen it all, but retains a determined and ferocious appetite for life and friends.

His looks remind me of a German Shepherd. A fierce animal, loyal to friends and lovers, but primal when provoked. Watching Tom Hardy on screen, it is fascinating to see his ability to tap into tragedy or savagery in a blink of an eye.

I also always wished I had his ability to grow the right amount of scruff. The ability to grow facial hair has always eluded me and it genuinely pisses me off sometimes.

I do like his style too. He can transform himself easily with certain clothes. Classy in a tux or precise in tactical gear, he can fit it all. Something I too, take pride in.

So why do I want to be more attractive?

Well it’s a pipe dream isn’t it? To look your best, is to generally feel your best too. I think everyone has an desire to be the kind of person that could stop traffic with a glance. To have people lust after you and envy you, is probably one of the closest things to godhood a human can achieve.

Universal attraction is becoming more of a thing, in my honest opinion. You can have people admiring others from all over the globe. A Middle Eastern beauty is not inherently less attractive than an American. A gorgeous European male is not less admired than an Australian hunk.

What would I do if I was more attractive?

Probably sleep around a lot more. Be in shorter relationships. It’s always been a fear of mine that I would become some sort of bachelor if it weren’t for the amazing women I’ve dated (2). Some terrible sleaze that treats women horribly and engage in sexual dalliances often.

I can’t really imagine a worse fate for me. I also wonder what if I did the opposite? I never used this attractiveness to it’s full potential? I stay single, insecure about women, not sure if they really like me for who I am, or am just thirsty for my looks and to boost their own social standing amongst friends and family.

Could I ever be taken seriously if I was a lot more attractive? That is probably one of the biggest questions applied to beautiful people. Objectification and belittlement of their intelligence. People can’t take them seriously, because their beauty taps too much into their primal sexual desires, and that is an obvious disadvantage.

Would I be more narcissistic? Would I dress better? Become more self-absorbed and infatuated with myself, knowing that there are legion of women who would sleep with me, given an ounce of encouragement?

Would I abuse that power?

Would it help me get better jobs?

That’s an interesting facet, rarely discussed. Attractive people are more likely to be hired, heard and seen.

If I knew my looks translated well on camera, I would probably be less camera-shy and feel more confident projecting myself out there.

Perhaps my introversion would be less pronounced.

Interesting ….

I am not insecure about my looks however. I know my strengths and have long accepted that this is what I look like and there is very little I would change.

More dieting and exercise would probably be advantageous though.

This was a fun What If? to write. To wonder what a peak version of yourself looks like, is always a fun thought experiment.

Perhaps a slightly more sensual, scruffy and racy Damocles would be a bit too much.

Or maybe not.

~ Damocles.

One day, I’ll be projecting the same kind of attractiveness, even candidly.

What If? Damocles was wealthy.

Villa La Gaeta, Lake Como, Italy, featured in the ending of Casino Royale (2006).

Wealth is an all too familiar obsession of mine.

Not in the accumulation of wealth. But in the expenditure.

To look at my spending habits, my bank details, would be akin to stealing more bread and wine from the Church’s altar.

You know it’s wrong, a violation of something sacred. But you’re hungry and thirsty and damned anyway, so what is one more act of religious criminality?

Savings accounts are like my bread and wine. I shouldn’t touch and draw from them. It goes against conventional respect and wisdom, but I’m desperate to buy that brand new Barbour jacket. So what is one more addition to my Afterpay loans?

I have a terrible list, as long and wide as the litany of sins I’ve committed. The purchases on that list could probably kickstart a small economy into shape and secure a decent loan on a house.

But it is a definitive list of all the things I desire. Everything from aspirin and CRKT knives to Hibachi grills, and Tom Ford Windsor suits are on that list. I’ve even bothered to list them in the order I want to get them in.

It is ever so slightly sickening how much I wish to engage in capitalism. Such is the price though, of my many varied interests. There are thousands of books, knives, guns, bows and arrows, racing parts, clothes and accessories I want to get.

Normally though, the list wouldn’t be a problem. Everyone has one of their own. My issue is that my list is too exorbitantly priced.

I could be happy with just a pair of cheap jeans. But instead I choose to value a more expensive pair because they should ideally last longer, function better in environments I want them to, and I am actually a sucker for certain brands.

I also love to eat expensively, dress exclusively and relax at lavish bars.

A major Achilles’ heel.

So …. what if I was wealthy?

For starters, my ego would probably shoot through the roof. There’s almost definitely a genuine chance that I would be every single cliche of the “young, rich, privileged, conceited, elitist asshole.” I would probably even lack the self-awareness to correct it, instead choosing to proudly wear that badge like it was some kind of trophy.

I actually have so many plans though, if I was wealthy.

The dream is to own a penthouse in the city somewhere, or along a beach, where the horizon stretches out forever, and I can stand against a large window, emulating the scene from Heat (1995). Ideally the spacious apartment complex would have a display room with all my collectibles, ranging from a record player with vinyls, a cabinet with small plaques for all my Star Wars Original Trilogy LEGO sets, and shelves upon shelves of books.

I would also love a 10 car garage, similar to my fictional lifestyle in Grand Theft Auto Online, with numerous vehicles, ranging from the sublime like the Aston Martin Superleggera, to the exotic like the McLaren 720s and the classic like the Toyota 2000GT.

There would be an internal elevator to take these cars from the top to the bottom, naturally.

I would also love to have a separate place, a hidden basement under some business I own, (perhaps my own Event Company office) where I’d have access to an indoor range, lounge and squash court. The range would be effectively soundproofed and air-conditioned, an easy place for me to practice marksmanship and do basic drills. Whether I am using my guns or my bow, either way, I can get lots of reps in.

The squash court provides extra exercise and incentive for me to get better at one my favourite sports, with this basement also equipped with a simple parkour course, with plenty of bars for me to swing off and hone my agility.

Back at my apartment, I would also have an entertainment room, with a gaming pc, a racing simulator rig, and 3 arcade cabinets of my favourite childhood games: Time Crisis 2, Initial D and Dance Dance Revolution. This room would also feature a beautiful pool table, and a kick-ass cinema system, with a small bar located in the corner.

I would be striving for a highly minimalist designs for my apartment, with easy access to a private helicopter (The tiny, fun, fast and manoeuvrable MD 500) that I would learn how to fly. I could use this helicopter for business purposes, cut through traffic, or find an easy way to travel to my private boat, which would actually be a racing catamaran that I would take out for fun. This vessel would be based off the vehicles seen in the SailGP.

I like to think that despite my wealth, I would be constantly striving to improve myself. I would have a strict schedule of Krav Maga, Squash, Parkour, Competitive Shooting, Racing and Writing.

I would love to be able to fund myself into a competitive racing scene, perhaps the Porsche or Ferrari challenge, something that is professional, but not as hardcore as the Formula series. Even something as fun and casual as rallycross could be an option, as I would definitely buy a shitbox and tear its internal apart and create the perfect RX vehicle.

My wardrobe would be a walk-in, with a large mirror to compensate for the tiny one I currently own. I would have rows of suits, blue, grey, brown, cream and black. There would be a myriad of shoes to match, tactical gear ranging from assault shirts to war-belts, and a vast collection of headgear.

Combat helmets with NODs (Night Observation Devices), Morale Patch Caps, Racing Helmets, Fencing Masks and Cricket Helmets, to name a few, would line neatly next to each other. I have always loved masks and headgear, so no doubt this collection would blossom rapidly with far too much disposable income.

A Roman Centurion Helmet has always been one of my obsessive pieces of antiquity that I wanted to own, and I would display it with a replica cuirass and greaves on a marble mannequin. This set of course, wouldn’t be complete without a replica gladius and pilum.

Throughout the apartment, I would also feature a lot of different type of artwork, with an emphasis on my friends’ work and fascinating racing and travel posters from the past, with iconic marketing appeal.

I’ve always envisioned highly modern aesthetics, for this place, with a lot of glass and dark wood.

I think at the end of the day, I would be trying to constantly spend my wealth everywhere, because …. I have so many interests and hobbies I want to pursue and the only way I can possibly do it all, if I have a huge amount of money to sustain such luxuries.

I like to think that I would use my wealth to elevate my friends. Treat them to expensive meals, birthday gifts and help them along with any jobs or get better at trading and investments.

I’ve always thought that the accumulation of wealth is a pointless venture. There is no point in having so much money, that you do not know what to do with it. I prefer to spend everything, and know that I’ve driven myself destitute because I’ve strived to be more than the zeros in my account.

The world is too interesting, too strange and too exciting to be a miserable miser. I just want enough to pursue all my passions without worrying whether I can afford a meal.

God are they numerous.

I could probably add scuba-diving, piano playing (jazz) sky-diving, BASE-jumping, archaeology, Napoleonic antiquities, gaming … really, the list goes on and on.

I like to think, despite my wealth, I will probably still be poor.

Because I’ll be out there chasing everything I always wanted to explore.

~ Damocles.

What If? Damocles was Patriotic.

Swearing Allegiance to the Southern Cross by Charles A Doudiet.

Patriotism is the virtue of the vicious – Oscar Wilde.

For any of my international readers, if you haven’t surmised yet, I am of an Australian background. That is what is shown on my passport, despite my clearly Asiatic surname and my scowling mien of a photo.

I am probably the antithesis of what is expected from an Australian. I dislike the beach, due to the smell, my weak swimming ability and admittedly the inability to shake off the fact that the sea is really … full of fish semen and shit.

I am a teetotaller, a highly un-Australian trait, that probably alienated me more than any other aspect of my personality. I just don’t enjoy the taste of alcohol. It is almost as if I can taste the OH bonds in a drink.

I’m not blonde either, another common misconception, due to all our famous exports being famously fair-haired. Margot Robbie, Cate Blanchett, Chris Hemsworth, Elizabeth Debicki, Nicole Kidman … to name a few.

Perhaps the only famous dark-haired Australian, is Hugh Jackman, and to a lesser extent Rose Bryne (who was one of my crushes growing up, upon seeing her in Troy (2004). What was it about curly-haired Mediterranean women for me?).

I am also exceedingly pale and a touch overweight, (hence my B30 Challenge) a far cry from the usual tanned, fit bodies portrayed in media.

Yes, I am aware of Vegemite, and yes, I hate the spread. It just taste like a strange soy sauce paste and is far too strong for my liking on … anything really.

The final stereotype I like to address is the idea that most Australians are easy-going. Anyone aware of my personality, aura or presence, know this to be the opposite.

I am anything but “easy-going.” I can range from charming to menacing, debonair and ruthless to warm and elitist, introspective to brusque but I am anything but easy-going.

In fact, I am probably one of the most terse and tense people you will met. But then you can probably tell that, in my writing.

So what does Damocles have in common with Australians then?

Uncouthness probably. I swear like a sailor, a terrible habit I developed during high school, after realising I could use bad language, simply because my parents weren’t around.

I do strive for creativity in my cussing though.

Perhaps, another concession might be my accent. Although, I personally believe it is very neutral and not particularly Australian. It probably doesn’t help that I barely use the word “mate” or use a lot of slang.

Beyond that, very little of me is stereotypically Australian.

Which is why I wanted to explore this topic of patriotism.

Ever since I figured out who I am, I have always held the belief that I am just “me.” I don’t identify as Asian. Nor Australian. Nor anything else for that matter. Life has always been a lot simpler, choosing not to pigeon-hole myself into a certain category.

After all, if you choose to identify as “something”, you limit yourself and have to adjust emotionally if you want to break out of that box you’ve chose to be in. Even admitting there are flaws in that box, is a tough pill to swallow after so much mental investment.

Accepting everything about me, as a multi-faceted, complex, diverse person; the sum of many parts, has really allowed me to explore all the things I enjoy and love, without feeling I sacrificed something for the other.

I can be a writer. I can be a shooter. I can be a racer. I can be a music collector. I can be a LEGO Builder. I can be an archer. A fencer, a gamer, a confidant, a leader, a friend, a lover … the list goes on.

I can be anything I want, without feeling like I betrayed something else.

This freedom in who I am has really granted me the ability to never lack in self-esteem.

Thus if I saw myself more as an Australian I get the feeling I would probably feel a lot more shame at the moment.

I get this feeling, I would be a lot more politically active. After all, most politicians come from a good place. They see something is remiss in their country and want to do something to fix it. They’re all inherently patriotic, all of them idealistic and eager to fix the country.

But only their way will suffice.

Would I have more Australian flags strewn everywhere? Already on my military gear, with my morale patches, I like to fly flags. My shoulder, my cap … it’s standard procedure to have your nation’s flag emblazoned across your uniform.

But I identify more with the Union Jack, than the Australian flag. I’ve always saw myself as a bit more of a Brit, than an Aussie. Even when I was considering military service, I wanted to join the 22nd SAS Regiment of UKSF not the SASR of the ADF.

Perhaps racism might be a stronger factor in my life, colouring the way how I view the world. Seeing outsiders as undesirable people to my country. What a fucked-up way of looking at the world, especially as I am technically an outsider. We all are. One way or another, we emigrated, moved away and made a life elsewhere, in our ancestry.

What do I associate with patriotism? I guess I judge it by the American standard.

  • Overwhelmingly positive perception of country: America is the greatest country on Earth.
  • Unyielding respect and support for members of Armed Forces: Thank you for your service.
  • Strong symbolism is regards to colours, aesthetics and display: Heavy use of blues, reds and white as well as the American Flag being considered a sacred symbol.
  • Strong loyalty to head of state: POTUS, and the mythology around the President’s role.
  • Heavy repetition of values: Truth, justice and independence. The rights to bear arms.

I don’t think anywhere else in the world, do you see such willingness to be patriotic and worshipful to the mythology of America, despite its’ clear struggles. From the very poorest to the richest, Americans love to parrot how great their country is, how blessed it is, like it was chosen by God.

I doubt I stomach it for very long. But then I wasn’t born there.

My indoctrination isn’t as strong.

Out of all of those traits, I only engage in the second, due to my natural affiliation with men in green.

I probably share the same disrespectful attitude to our Prime Minister with all other Australians, I am unsure what “Australian” values are, beyond the cliches of “mateship, fair dinkum and a fair go for all.

I don’t really like the Australian flag, from a purely aesthetic standpoint, hence my preference for the Union Jack and I definitely do not have a rosy viewpoint of our country.

Am I proud to be Australian?

Yes and No.

Yes because honestly, it’s objectively a very nice to live.

No, because honestly, it’s subjectively could be a much better place to live, if we could actually get off our arses and do more.

Nothing annoys me more, than wasted potential.

Australia has a lot of that to be brutally honest.

I mostly blame Canberra for that.

This one was a struggle to write, because it is such an antithesis of who I am. All the other scenarios seem plausible in alternate dimensions. A military man on Earth #479. A desperate and dangerous degenerate on Earth #34. A love-struck and swooning Damocles on #Earth 69.

But a patriotic Damocles? That seems like an inherent betrayal of who I am.

A more vicious, a more blind version of myself, that if it was possible to meet, I would probably hate him. Blind loyalty to anything or even anyone, is so …. unattractive.

(I couldn’t think of a better word. I kept flashing back to my horror at the idea of having an insipid girlfriend, who clung to my every word and action. No thank you. I want someone independent and confident. Partners should be doting, but never clingy.)

At the end of the day, I don’t think I have much allegiance to anyone or anything just yet, beyond my friends, family and the people I actually know and can respect. I’m fiercely close-minded that way.

Life is just easier, when you care more about the people around you, instead of worrying those far away.

~ Damocles

Melodies, Melancholia, Moods & Melbourne.

Empty Degraves St (Source)

To set the scene … I’m sitting, in a largely silent house, listening to Japanese Jazz, and playing with a folder knife.

Soft amber light is casting my room in a comfortable glow, my legs are sprawled comfortably across my chair and bed and I wish I was smoking a cigarette, despite never having had any tobacco before.

I’m lounging like this, when it struck me that I still got two more weeks of this isolation lockdown, this lovely house arrest after our illustrious Melbourne Premier, announced his “roadmap” out COVID-19 last Sunday on the auspicious day of the 6th of September.

The moment that thought struck me, I felt this strange sense of calm resigned depression overcome my thoughts. Several nihilistic actions happened soon after.

I felt bizarrely like dropping my knife into my thigh. Then I wanted to throw it into the wall. Finally, my fingers moved and just gave the knife a couple of twirls, before placing it down gently.

That’s enough of that silliness said my mind to my mind. I agree said my voice to myself.

Nostalgia soon arrived after, like the scent of spring after a long winter, and reminded me what I missed.

The city of Melbourne.

I’ve always beheld her as some dangerously seductive femme fatale in my mind.

Clad in a appropriately black cocktail dress, Melbourne had enchanting emerald eyes like the numerous parks, long wavy raven hair that sparkled like the Yarra at night and lightly sun-kissed skin, akin to her best side at sunsets.

Her voice would be husky, Lauren Bacall-esque in delivery and cadence. She would be moody, like the weather, able to dazzle with daylight and disparage with hail in a heartbeat.

(Just imagine a Elizabeth Debicki type with dark hair and you’re getting a close approximation of how I imagine Melbourne. Elegant, refined beauty that somehow floors you with mysterious wise eyes. Did you know she is a Melburnian? How quaint that such an extremely tall, statuesque silver screen goddess would come from this neck of the woods. But I always long held the belief that the women in Melbourne were beautiful, like the city itself.)

But Melbourne would always be welcoming, enticing you to explore more of her fun, secretive personality, to discover what hidden treasures she had tucked away for the curious.

I miss spending nights with her.

Finding bars in the unlikeliest places. Scouting rooftops that could take your breath away with the climb, the guards and the view. Appreciating quiet venues with comfortable sofas, a fireplace and transit ambience.

I would always visit her at least once a month. I love my home-town too much, to neglect Melbourne like that. There is always something on offer, always some covert restaurant that promised more delicious food, or some tucked-away club that catered to Cuban cigar aficionados.

You can see the highest of highs in Melbourne, and experience the lowest of lows all in the same night.

I think that is what I am finding difficult to grapple with the most. The slow, inexorable death of personality within, that only happens when days merge into each other, when weeks become confused and foggy, the future offering no light at the end of your tunnel.

I know, I know. This is all very dramatic.

I blame the Japanese Jazz, I’m listening to.

Before I was compelled to write this … whatever this is …. I was playing what I call “lethargic” music, the type of slightly edgy, dark, sensual and atmospheric sounds that lulls you into thinking all type of wrong things. Check out The Pink Room by Angelo Badalamenti or Out of Time by Brian Reitzell if this kind of thing appeals to you.

It only ever does, when I feel like fully embracing nihilism, a very unhealthy thing to do in these times, because feeling like there is no purpose, will only make you more aware of how time has dulled in this lockdown.

Feeling mopey, I then channelled French jazz, the type of songs that make you long for the touch of a woman, a stiff drink, a cigarette and a comfortable bed to partake in all of those things. Dance Me to the End of Love by Madeleine Peyroux is arguably the love song of my entire romantic lifespan. I always indulge in this song, when I crave a girl to convince me everything is going to be OK, with her touch, her voice and her gentle ministrations.

Royal Blue by Henry Macini is the second most romantic song I’ve ever heard in my entire life. Whenever I indulge in fond romantic memories, this always plays softly in the background. The melody always rekindles this feeling of simpler, more maudlin and glamorous times, when life wasn’t quite the shitstorm of stress it is now.

I couldn’t quite stand how emotional I was getting, and the knife twirls were only getting more furious.

So I moved onto Japanese Jazz, in particular the work of Yuji Ohno of Lupin the Third fame.

Quite possibly what I consider the jazz national anthem of Japan, Lupin the Third‘s theme, is iconic in the extreme, but it is the song Mayflower that I really adore.

Calming, slow, with a really beautiful piano melody, Mayflower never fails to relaxes me and let me soak in some kind of strange tranquil ambience.

But by then, I was feeling myself slip into too much of a relaxed state. So I switched it up to the excellent album Cafe Relaxin’ Lupin and ended up really wishing I could be sipping a hot chocolate in a rain soaked alleyway of Melbourne, watching people and cars go by.

It’s strange, because now as I reflect upon these past months of COVID-19, I realised I’ve truly run a gambit and exhausted all options. I’ve spent recklessly, gamed frantically, read furiously, written copiously, exercised manically and watched entertainment habitually … but now all I have left are my thoughts.

I’ve outlasted myself. Robbed myself of anything left to do.

Purpose is bereft at the moment. All the lights I’ve tried to maintain are being extinguished in favour of wallowing in the dark of nihilistic sadness.

Thanks COVID-19. Truly appreciate this exploration of the depth of despair.

Hmph.

At least I still got my sarcastic, bitter sense of humour. That’s the one thing nothing will ever rob from me.

I’m not really sure what was the point of writing all of this down was. But it did serve a purpose. It allowed me to vent, to acknowledge the state I am in and feel like I am actually in touch with how I truly feel.

Sometimes, when I write, I just want to write, without rhyme, rhythm or reason.

This is one of those posts.

Utterly rubbish drivel, composed in absurd alliteration, and half-baked similes.

But, this is really how I feel. I’m just getting in touch with myself, through me.

That’s important, when there is so much craziness out there.

Sometimes when we are alone, we have to be our own company.

That isn’t crazy. It’s just logical.

COVID-19 really does strip everyone down to their bare basics.

I feel a bit like Pandora’s Box, my many emotions released into the world like the evils in trapped within.

All that is left is my scornful humour. My “hope” is my cynical amusement.

When Damocles is truly crushed, and fermented and turned into wine …

Acerbic wit, is my distilled essence.

That’s not so bad is it?

No, I suppose it isn’t.

Thanks COVID-19. I hate it.

~ Damocles.

Walking Between the Raindrops

Mulan (2020) – Cinema Review

Y/N? No.

Director: Niki Caro

Stars: Yifei Liu, Donnie Yen, Jason Scott Lee, Yoson An, Gong Li, Jet Li, Tzi Ma and Ron Yuan.

Review by Damocles.

It’s confused. Very confused.

Perhaps one of the biggest issues Disney seems to face when creating their live-action adaptations of beloved classic animated films, is their poor director choices.

Niki Caro, touted as a “progressive” move, due to being the 2nd female director hired by Disney to helm a 100 million dollar film, is truly out of her depth directing Mulan, a story that is inherently based around action film, due to its war-torn Chinese setting.

A prominent drama director, whose film Whale Rider was actually studied by yours truly in high school, (even then I didn’t think much of it, beyond wishing I had a Kiwi accent), Caro seems to struggle both dramatically and action wise in a film that is best described as mediocre.

This poor choice in directors, is echoed recently with Aladdin. I remember being noticeably confused when I heard, Guy Ritchie, of iconic British gangster film fame, was being helmed to direct that particular adaptation. His natural ability and directing style, seemed to lack panache under the supervision of the Mouse, with a lot of his iconic fast-paced dialogue, clever cutting and ingenious editing skills that were so wonderfully put to use in 2019’s The Gentlemen, put aside for more basic directorship.

Which begs the question, of why would you hire Guy Ritchie to direct your film if you tie his arms creatively?

Or, more aptly, in Mulan’s case, why didn’t you hire Guy Ritchie to direct or industry famous Kathryn Bigelow, whose body of work is indisputably based around realistic action cinema, the very narrative that Disney has backed to justify the removal of big musical numbers and Mushu.

(Or just straight up hire Stephen Chow, whose unnatural ability to balance fantastical, action, comedy and the drama would be perfect for an adaptation of the animated Mulan.)

Caro’s directing ability struggles to properly balance the inherent darkness of warfare, Mulan’s internal struggles and the strange injections of fantastical elements like the Witch, Chi or Phoenix, all of them being needless additions to the story, and are actually detrimental to the overall tone.

The story itself is poorly paced and constructed, lacking a strong emotional core to properly generate investment in the characters on screen. Many characters, from Donnie Yen’s Commander Tung, to Tzi Ma’s Hua Zhou, lack proper introduction on-screen, and personal motivation that would generate conflict or motivation to the protagonist.

Mulan herself, is another casualty in the “Disney-nification” of female heroines, with her stoic, emotionless portrayal, and inherent ability to master “chi” in the same vein as Captain Marvel of the Marvel Cinematic Universe or Rey from the Star Wars universe.

The overpowered nature of these characters, with an emphasis on suppressing prodigy level of talent and skill, is the opposite of empowerment. It underwhelms the idea of struggle, and growth, perseverance in the face of adversity, arguably the most important aspect to portray on screen to generate relatability and connection between character and audience.

Mulan’s natural gift of “chi” (a poor substitute for the Force or superpowers), that is showcased in the first 5 minutes of her introduction, immediately sets a poor precedent, as it is tonally deaf to the realistic tone the film is striving to project, and distances audience relatability to her.

All of this is difficult to stomach, as the cast for the film, is the creme de la creme of Chinese acting talent, forced to perform their best, whilst being squandered and wasted at the same time.

The term “glorified extras”, seems harsh when talking about known leading men like Jet Li or Donnie Yen, but it is unquestionably true. Dialogue is stilted, repetitive to the point of hammering you over the head with the virtues, with delivery no-doubt suffering due to a decision to film in English, something that is more detrimental than immersive to the experience.

Of particular disappointment is the villain, Bori Khan, who doesn’t chew up scenery enough nor have any relationship with Mulan, leaving the final climax difficult to enjoy. The animated film suffered from something similar, but Shan Yu’s portrayal was far more charismatic and menacing, his overall design and demeanour on the right side of dramatic. Bori Khan’s on the other-hand suffers from the opposite, with bland design and personal motivation. On an directing level, Khan is played too straight and seriously, when in reality Jason Scott Lee should be more over-the-top and cartoonish to add more menace to the character’s aura and screen presence.

From a technical standpoint, Mulan has attractive use of colours, with costumes being largely fun, vibrant and attractive, a definite attempt to add depth to the landscape, which occasionally shines, only to be replaced by poor CG backdrops.

I largely found the action sequences to be thoroughly underwhelming, with too many strange camera moves, desperately trying to amp up the intensity of the fights, which lack proper choreography, depth, motivation and duration. For a war-film, there are a surprising lack “epic” shots, that are typical of “medieval” style armies and admittedly a couple of glaring unbelievable moments from a tactical standpoint (trebuchets deployed against infantry, Mulan’s cavalry charge, Khan’s strange introduction, Mulan’s ability to teleport from A to B and the Witch’s abilities far too powerful).

On the actual score itself, this is sadly one of Harry Gregson-Williams less inspired work, with a lot of the score being rehashes of the animated film, with a rather bizarre Prince of Persia: Sands of Time (2010) twist added here and there, that upon listening to the score, I was thoroughly bewildered by, until I realised that he seemingly took a lot of his Prince of Persia music and applied it to the Rourans, due to their desert tribe nature.

Which is oddly discriminatory, as Middle Eastern higher pitches and shriller noises don’t quite apply to Mongolian steppes’ sounds, which are typically deeper and “throatier” (look it up).

The score was arguably my biggest disappointment, as I am usually enthralled by Gregson-Williams’ work, and I did wish there was an Asian composer who could provide a bit more bombast to the score, similar in the vein to the songs heard in the film Kung Fu Hustle (2004).

Overall, Mulan (2020) is a disappointing adaptation of the animated film, that fails to bring anything new to the table, nor add anything of substance to the lore. Many missed opportunities could have been fixed with a more rounded and inventive director, especially in regard to the score, action sequences, character development and overall tone.

Disney needs to take more risks with their approach to their Renaissance classics, and to actually choose and employ people who have the right skills, not because they fulfil an agenda.

To sum up, Mulan (2020) is not worth the $30.00 price point. In all honesty, that 30 dollars should be spent on getting a VPN, accessing a torrent site and finding a good copy there.

A scene to recall: When Ming Na-Wen (the original Mulan voice actor from the animated film) turned up briefly.

SPOILERS SECTION (FOR FUN):

I’ve created a small list below, to just quickly run through a lot of the plot inconsistencies and mistakes I noted throughout the film, and detrimental they are to the overall story. Please do not read further if spoilers annoy you.

  • Mulan’s father’s injury would have already sent him home, the moment he arrived on camp, due to the military’s strict training regime, thus nullifying the need for Mulan’s sacrifice.
  • Mulan’s iconic bathing sequence is odd simply because water is … transparent. Honghui would have noted her feminine figure.
  • There is a lack of characterisation with Mulan’s comrades. None of them particularly stand out to my disappointment and nor was there a sequence when all were inspired by Mulan’s success.
  • The journey from her home to the army camp was bewildering to say the least, especially since why would the Army afford to lost another recruit, when she should have linked up at a staging area, before being transported to the actual base itself.
  • The passage itself would have been a good opportunity for Mulan to reflect on her decision to steal her father’s honour, through a proper monologue, but instead we got silent flashbacks
  • The only true standout action sequence was when the Witch was kicking ass, but Mulan never gets her own proper action sequence, where she proves herself to be the best warrior in a convincing way.
  • How was Mulan able to ride behind the trebuchets, whilst in front of them still confuses me or how she was so quickly able to traverse around the Imperial City and get to the Emperor.
  • What was the actual point of the Phoenix beyond a ham-fisted symbol? Or Mulan’s sister for that matter? Was her whole character supposed to be summed up as “arachnophobic?”
  • Honghui and Mulan’s chemistry was … questionable to say the least.
  • Usually avalanches occur higher up. The trebuchet “hot-shot” landed at the base of the mountain.
  • Mulan’s “chi” usage was confusing and strange, with a lot of inconsistency regarding her true talent. It also degraded the other men in the Army a lot, something that bothered me greatly.
  • Mulan doesn’t particularly have a lot of range, in terms of emotion throughout the whole film.
  • Niki Caro clearly stole a lot of scenes from other films. Mad Max Fury Road (2015), Lord of the Rings Trilogy (2003) and bizarrely Dracula Untold (2014) to name a few.
  • I truly wished they stuck to Mandarin as the primary language and made the rest of the world read subtitles, because the actors gave it a valiant effort, but could not emote in English well.
  • There are a lot of strange cutting throughout the whole film. Some scenes dragged on for too long and some action sequences were cut too short.
  • There is this strange precedent to show that women are “stronger” than men, in terms of physicality. I find this dangerously unrealistic and delusional. I do not have a problem with the animated depiction of Mulan’s abilities and strength, because they showed how a smaller, more lithe and agile woman uses those abilities to outsmart and out-think a man who is physically more imposing than her. I found it highly troublesome when Mulan just outright, brute strength her buckets of water to the top of the mountain, when much bigger and stronger men than her struggled. I was truly hoping that during the training sequence, we would see some type of growth, and struggle that Mulan went through that showed how much effort she had to put in to keep up with the boys. But alas, none of that promise came through.
  • The lack of musical numbers, robbed Mulan a lot of her “voice.” In the animated films, the musical numbers were there to provide a thrilling, emotional insight into the characters. We never got that with this Mulan, hence the lack of emotional investment in her character.
  • Donnie Yen is always underappreciated in Hollywood films. His speed is never showcased properly. Tsk.
  • The Witch and Mulan’s friendship … was so out of left-field and lacking in proper motivation. The Witch could have outright just overpowered everyone and became a Queen and force everyone to accept her.
  • Khan’s big fire death for the Emperor was … ridiculously unsatisfying. He should have just killed him ouright with her sword.
  • The fake-out death of Cricket … is so J.J. Abrams. Cheap, stupid, emotionally dumb and pointless. Please stop this trend.
  • Also why didn’t Khan shoot another arrow at Mulan and the Witch?
  • Final two thing … Mulan’s scale armour around her legs, proved terribly distracting to me. I really wished her legs were freed from the armour. She removed the upper half, so it still bewildered me, as to why she kept it. It didn’t match the rest of the costume well.
  • The words “honour, warrior and phoenix” were so overused. I really wished someone consulted a thesaurus.

TRON: Legacy (IMPACT Series)

Flynn’s arcade.

Welcome to the IMPACT series where I dissect notable and iconic sequences from games and movies, and how they broadened my mind and left a lasting impression on me, years to come. 

The Grid. A digital frontier

The Backdrop

Tron: Legacy, isn’t one of those films that I consider “great.”

But, admittedly, I am a huge fan of it, because I changed my mindset about what films can be, and I’ve decided that, this wasn’t a film, it was a music video.

So with that mindset in place, I announced proudly to myself to the critics and audience that disliked it, that this film is the greatest music video ever made.

Coming out in relative obscurity, in 2010, Tron: Legacy was … admittedly always destined to fail. Almost no-one had any memory of the original made in 1982 (I know I certainly didn’t) and poor marketing ensured that this sequel was underwhelmed at the box office. The Tron fanbase was always niche, so effectively, this sequel felt like the first film for a lot of people.

So what captivated me to see it?

The directing, if I was honest.

Joseph Kosinski craftmanship, and cool colour grading to the “real world” grabbed me from the very start and hooked me in. The boys at my favourite Youtube channel, RedLetterMedia described it best, in their Re:View, “if David Fincher directed a corny Disney movie.”

I particularly remember the transition shot of Sam Flynn riding away on his bike, and the shot of him weaving through traffic and the brief chase sequence between him and the police.

Tron Legacy may not have the greatest plot, dialogue or character development, but its’ art style and world, film direction and music makes it captivating watching.

Just look at the art direction … disc wars, neon, gladiatorial arena, everything is so stylish compared to the original Tron in 1982.

The Impact.

The complete redesign of a lot of iconic aspects of the original Tron was for the betterment of the film. Recognizers, Light Cycles, even the actual suits underwent complete overhauls that truly made Tron a fresh and exciting film to see on screen.

Everything had such a unique sterile, clean and strong aesthetic, with the use of neon light blues and orange reds allowing vehicles, suits, and buildings to have a clear outline, while appearing slightly transparent.

The darkness that surrounded Tron‘s world was never too dark, the world achieving more character with clouds and fog, and allowing vehicles like the original Light Cycle to cut through cinematically.

Glass, and liquid seem to meld beautifully together, especially with the liquid like trail that shot out from behind the Light Cycles or how programs when they “derezzed”, seemed to shatter into million of pieces of glass.

CGI, in a film, tends to age horribly. Tron Legacy’s visual effects remain excellent even today, a trend I noticed that is common with a lot of music video films. Their score, art design, special effects and overall direction seem to last the ages. Look no further than Blade Runner.

However, what truly sold the film, was Daft Punk’s score. Easily one of the most anticipated aspects of the film, as it heralded the return of the legendary French electronic duo.

Simultaneously epic, orchestral and pulsating electronic, the score is phenomenal in how it handles the emotions on-screen, and accentuates action sequences.

Heavy use of non-traditional synth with sweeping orchestral sounds ensured that Tron Legacy’s score will never fade away into obscurity. To say that I’ve listened to this score over 500 times from end to end, is probably not an exaggeration. It has everything I’ve ever really wanted in a soundtrack.

Also equal importance is to note Disney’s role in this film, which was minimal, as they themselves, seem to know what a niche IP this was for them. Whilst, I am saddened by the news that this franchise never seemed to take off, (even with recent news that a Tron 3 is in development), the film itself warrants repeat viewing, my eyes often wishing they could soak a bit longer in the world.

Light cycles are simply right up there with one of the coolest movie vehicles ever designed.

The Enrichment.

Before Tron Legacy, I was never really into electronic music, the current trend at the time, being too generic and loud for my taste.

However, with the discovery of its’ score, I wanted to delve further into Daft Punk‘s work.

And what a source of music it was.

I ended up downloading every single album I could find of theirs, poring over Homework, Discovery, Human After All, and soon to be released was Random Access Memories.

I had no idea that the electronic sounds of the late 90s, early 00s, were so distinct and different to 10s of the 2000s.

There was a bit more funk, a bit more synth and retro to Daft Punk‘s music than I had previously heard in any of the remixes by the current disc jockeys and I absolutely loved it.

Without Tron Legacy, I wouldn’t have discovered the amazing discography of Daft Punk.

I still haven’t quite gotten in more electronic music though. Something about EDM, is just not to my style. Although, that being said, I am still a sucker for the nightclub music in Grand Theft Auto V.

What I’ve also noticed is that ever since Daft Punk was able to score a major film like Tron Legacy, other electronic artists have had their time to shine, beyond the greats like Hans Zimmer, John Williams, such as Junkie XL, M83 or Skrillex.

I have to admit, it’s a rather novel idea, to get DJs to score films, because their diverse knowledge of sounds and database makes them ideal artists to hire for unique scores.

It is a crime, that this score never won anything. It is easily one of the best soundtracks ever made.

The Culmination.

Tron Legacy is probably one of the most rewatched films in my limited history of cinema-viewing. The world, aesthetic, music and overall atmosphere makes for such captivating viewing, and is probably arguably one of the most influential design concepts in my teenage years.

It had such an influence, that I remember in my economics class of high school, I had the idea to recreate the iconic End of Line nightclub in Melbourne. It was to feature music from the film, similarly garbed bartenders, and the entrance would be accented with neon stairs to light up the Southbank area of the Yarra River.

Besides, a film that introduced me to the discography of Daft Punk will always be appreciated.

There is probably a lot more I can nerd up about this film, but I’ll digress for now.

IMPACT

~ Damocles

Every frame is a painting.

Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare’s All Ghillied Up (IMPACT Series)

Captain MacMillan being the badass he is.

Welcome to the IMPACT series where I dissect notable and iconic sequences from games and movies, and how they broadened my mind and left a lasting impression on me, years to come. 

I’ll say one thing, you’ve certainly got the minerals.

The Backdrop.

Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare is my first proper gaming addiction and … definitely one of the most fundamental pillars in my teenage development. The mulitplayer alone probably sucked out 500 hours of my life and created lifelong sleeping issues, because I stayed up till 3am replaying the game over and over.

I say fundamental, because it was one of my first proper introduction into contemporary warfare, beyond the dated Battlefield 2 (which will be covered in another post).

Everything about this game, when it first loaded on my screen, blew me away. The term “photorealistic” had no meaning for me, until I played Crew Expendable. I, frankly, could not believe this was a video game. The previous Call of Duty games I had played in World War 2 looked cartoony and janky in comparison to the smoothness I was experiencing and the ultra realistic depiction of modern warfare.

The gun models had reflective glass on their scopes, the crisp red dots looked incredible as they centred on heads and the way how the Marines moved as they stacked up against doors and blew hinges off, was so incredibly immersive.

The environments were amazingly varied and had that unique lived in feel, where battle damage, graffiti, lighting and atmosphere coalesced into a beautiful visual symphony of war. Buildings were appropriately ram-shackled or crumbling apart, cars were appropriate amount of rust, and the appearances of random watermelon added some pop and colour to the amber art direction of the Middle East.

All Ghillied Up is arguably the Call of Duty mission that will last forever in memory. Is it heavily scripted? Absolutely.

But the immersion, stealth and sheer daringness of the mission and level design are second to none.

From the detail of your customised suppressed M24 sniper rifle with camo scrim, to the abandoned church pews that serve as a munition storage and watch-tower, and the dogs that howl when you shoot them, moving through Pripyat with its radioactive zones is never short of intense, anxious energy, your eyes constantly peeled for enemy patrols and obeying MacMillan’s orders when and how to take them out. Heartbeats across the world were pumped up furiously when you had to crawl through the grass, as an enemy convoy, literally a foot away from you, walked past, never noticing the 2 odd patches of grass that disguised SAS troopers.

The fact that this is a 2-parter flashback mission to an assassination, showcases the range of level design, atmosphere and wildly different type of tensions the COD team can conjure up, with All Ghillied Up being a tense stealth mission, whilst One Shot, One Kill an action packed escape and evasion sequence that offers a balance of thrilling shoot outs on the run and wave defence at the end.

Sneaking through radioactive areas. (Image taken from The Infinite Zenith)

The Impact.

Beyond accelerating my heartbeat to the pace of 4 consecutive Red Bulls consumed in 5 minutes, All Ghillied Up introduced me to the world of sniping. It also sparked my interest again in the military and almost everything in it.

But the biggest impact, was probably the identification of guns. I became obsessed with identifying weapons, like almost every other COD fanboy out there. This of course led to my interest in firearms as a whole, and my current desire to be a competitive shooter.

But why did I pick this mission out of all of the iconic sequences? Crew Expendable, Charlie Don’t Surf, Death From Above or No Fighting In The War Room are all equally iconic, equally memorable, with their depiction of modern warfare.

But All Ghillied Up stands above the rest, because it is the outlier mission in the entire campaign. It’s the only one that values stealth over all out chaos, the mission that lets you really soak in the atmosphere it is trying to create, instead of navigate the turmoil of battle. You have time to let your eyes wander, and hear MacMillan’s command very clearly over slow music, unlike Lieutenant Vasquez yelling at you over the booms of a M1A2 Abrams tank.

Story building is key and I guess that is why I remembered this mission the most, despite not replaying it a whole lot (that honour goes to War Pig).

The impact of this mission can’t be understated, because ever since it got released, COD itself has copied the same formula in all of its games moving on, and even the Sniper Elite, Sniper Ghost Warrior series have done their best to make an entire game around this gameplay/level design concept.

The abandoned church (Image taken from The Infinite Zenith)

The Enrichment.

What did I take away from All Ghillied Up?

Probably a lot more investment in the military if I am honest. Back then, I wasn’t as enamoured with the military, preferring to invest my time and energy into researching the espionage sector (a result of James Bond obsession).

But upon learning that most spies, or active duty members in the intelligence service stem from former Special Forces, I became more invested in finding out more.

I am arguably the biggest military “fan” amongst all my friends and did so much extensive research on Special Forces, I even went out of my way to try and source some of their gear, from cargo pants, to backpacks and shooting techniques. Even with my fake guns, I do my best to kit them out with realistic accessories like T2 Aimpoint optics, G33 Magnifiers, AN/PEQ-15 units and Surefire flashlights.

But beyond that, it has mostly been my knowledge of military techniques, applications and strict discipline that has benefited me the most.

Techniques like After Action Reviews in my event management roles, honest feedback regarding performance and skills, have helped me get better at creating and designing events.

Applications like the gear I buy, has helped me carry my tools and equipment for an event (torches, traffic wands, radios, etc) more effectively and address issues on the spot, instead of wasting time running back for more gear. It has also kept me active and healthy, even more alert, as I feel more attuned to the situation in an event, if I have this gear.

Strict discipline that has always defined military traditions and training, made me more aware of just how unfit I am and honestly, a big part of my Before 30 Challenge is due to my aspiration to be a fighting fit man.

All Ghillied Up made me want a sniper rifle, and a ghillie suit, but it opened to door to my current and perhaps forever, fascination with the military.

SASR / 1st Commando Regiment in Afghanistan

The Culmination.

All Ghillied Up still represents one of the best, authentic Call of Duty experiences in the entire franchise. Atmospheric, immersive, brilliantly scripted and executed, the mission is the clear outlier in the Call of Duty 4 campaign, and for good reason. It shows Infinity Ward is capable of something other than all-out guns-blazing chaos, but also great stealth, ingenuity and stealth tension.

The mission popularised sniping as as a concept, and fostered more mythology about long distance kills and the almost inhuman ability to reach out and end a life, from a kilometre away.

From a gameplay perspective, the level design is excellent from beginning to end, the location an inspired choice for an assassination attempt on the main villain, Imran Zakhaev, and the gunplay and stealth are all beautifully executed within the COD4 formula. Even today, the graphics of Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare hold up well, and it never quite get old, seeing that cloud of blood explode, as your suppressed M24 centres on an enemy’s head.

Eerie, tense and fun, All Ghillied Up inspired me to get more invested in the military, and to one day hide in the grass like a professional sniper.

I’m just not too keen on all the leeches that might crawl up my leg, after lying out in the grass for so long.

IMPACT

~ Damocles.

The Barrett M82 .50cal, the biggest, rifle in the Call of Duty 4 arsenal. Still one of my favourite moments in all of gaming.